aum Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 (edited) As a little boy climbed onto Santa's lap, Santa asked the usual, "And what would you like for Christmas?" The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped, "Didn't you get my E-mail?" Edited February 28, 2020 by aum flash13 and Karlston 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 On a hot, dusty day a cowboy rode into a small frontier town. Afterdismounting, he walked behind his horse, lifted it's tail and kissed it wherethe sun don't shine. An old man rocking by the general store witnessed thewhole thing. "Whudd'ya do that fer?" he asked. "Got chapped lips," the cowboy replied. The old man asked, "Does that help?" The cowboy said, "Nope, but it keeps me from lickin' 'em." flash13, TrojanK and Karlston 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 Apple announced today that it has developed a breast implant that can store and play music. The iTit will cost from $499 to $699, depending on cup size, speaker size, and storage capacity. This is considered a major social breakthrough, because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them. Karlston, flash13, leapinlizards and 1 other 2 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 TrojanK, leapinlizards, aum and 1 other 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Israeli_Eagle Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 Karlston, TrojanK and polinom00 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 aum and polinom00 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polinom00 Posted February 29, 2020 Share Posted February 29, 2020 Banana gore Karlston, flash13 and haris_sane69 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted February 29, 2020 Share Posted February 29, 2020 Karlston and haris_sane69 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 flash13 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 aum 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PLASMA Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 That's ok, I love indian food....🤣 Adenman 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands.... When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset. "You're running around with other women," she told her mate. "Eve, honey, you're being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You know you're the only woman on earth." The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by a strange pain in the chest. It was his darling Eve poking him rather vigorously about the torso. "What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded. "Counting your ribs," said Eve. xkryptonx 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 jbleck, TrojanK, Karlston and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 A policeman sends his wife and kid to a resort for a vacation. After a week he joined them in the hotel. As soon as he came to the hotel room he wanted to make love to his wife and gave her "the look". Whispering under her breath, the wife says, "No darling, we can't do it here, our kid is watching!" Husband replies, "You're right, lets go to the beach." After a while they make their way to the beach, they start to make love on an empty beach. All of a sudden, a policeman walks up to them. "Put your cloths on immediately, shame on you, you can't do that in public!" Embarrassed, the husband admits, "You are right, but I had a moment of weakness. We hadn't seen each other for an entire week. Now, I'm a policeman too, and it would be very embarrassing if you fine me." The cop thought for a second and said, "Don't worry... you are a colleague and it is your first time. But this is the third time I caught this b**** making love on this beach in the last week and she will have to pay." TrojanK 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 jbleck, Karlston, TrojanK and 1 other 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 Polly want a cracker... flash13 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 Karlston and TrojanK 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted March 2, 2020 Share Posted March 2, 2020 "My ancestry goes back all the way to Alexander the Great," said Christine. She then turned to Miriam and asked, "How far back does your family go?" "I don't know," replied Miriam, "all of our records were lost in the flood." xkryptonx and Karlston 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted March 2, 2020 Share Posted March 2, 2020 polinom00, Karlston and aum 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted March 2, 2020 Share Posted March 2, 2020 xkryptonx, polinom00, TrojanK and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polinom00 Posted March 2, 2020 Share Posted March 2, 2020 aum, xkryptonx, Karlston and 2 others 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flash13 Posted March 2, 2020 Share Posted March 2, 2020 Karlston 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PLASMA Posted March 3, 2020 Share Posted March 3, 2020 2 in 1....✌️ syd5237, phen0men4, Adenman and 3 others 2 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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