Karlston Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 TrojanK, funkyy, leapinlizards and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ducky88 Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 A Scotsman goes to the dentist and asks how much it is for an extraction. 85 pounds for an extraction sir" was the dentists reply. Och! huv ye nay got unythin cheaper", replies the Scotsman getting agitated. But that's the normal charge for an extraction sir", said the dentist. What aboot if ye didnae use uny anaesthetic?", asked the Scotsman hopefully. Well it's highly unusual sir, but if that's what you want, I suppose I can do it for 70 pounds, said the dentist. Hmmmm, what aboot if ye used one of ye dentist trainees and still wi' oot anaesthetic", said the Scotsman. Well it's possible but they are only training and I can't guarantee their level of professionalism, and it'll be a lot more painful, but I suppose in that case we can bring the price down to say 40", said the dentist. Och that's still a bit much, how aboot if ye make it a training session and have yon student do the extraction and the other students watchin and learnin", said the Scotsman hopefully. Hmmmmm, well OK, it'll be good for the students I suppose, I'll charge you only 5 pounds in that case", said the dentist. "Wonderful, it's a deal" said the Scotsman ... "Can ye book me wife for next Tuesday? pc71520, leapinlizards, funkyy and 3 others 1 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pc71520 Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 Why do fathers take an extra pair of Socks when they go Golfing? In case they get a Hole in one! ducky88, funkyy, Disco Bob and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disco Bob Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 My doctor said " Do you drink and if so how much?" I told him " Yes Guinness, £3.80 a pint" ducky88, Karlston, funkyy and 1 other 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funkyy Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 11 hours ago, ducky88 said: A Scotsman goes to the dentist and asks how much it is for an extraction. 85 pounds for an extraction sir" was the dentists reply. Och! huv ye nay got unythin cheaper", replies the Scotsman getting agitated. But that's the normal charge for an extraction sir", said the dentist. What aboot if ye didnae use uny anaesthetic?", asked the Scotsman hopefully. Well it's highly unusual sir, but if that's what you want, I suppose I can do it for 70 pounds, said the dentist. Hmmmm, what aboot if ye used one of ye dentist trainees and still wi' oot anaesthetic", said the Scotsman. Well it's possible but they are only training and I can't guarantee their level of professionalism, and it'll be a lot more painful, but I suppose in that case we can bring the price down to say 40", said the dentist. Och that's still a bit much, how aboot if ye make it a training session and have yon student do the extraction and the other students watchin and learnin", said the Scotsman hopefully. Hmmmmm, well OK, it'll be good for the students I suppose, I'll charge you only 5 pounds in that case", said the dentist. "Wonderful, it's a deal" said the Scotsman ... "Can ye book me wife for next Tuesday? I'm Scottish, that's a cruel misinterpretation of us Scots..we'd never spend 5 pounds so carelessly. Lexionline, Disco Bob, aum and 3 others 1 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 aum, funkyy, TrojanK and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pc71520 Posted November 8, 2022 Share Posted November 8, 2022 What do you call Malware on a Kindle? A Book-Worm. Karlston, Disco Bob and ducky88 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 8, 2022 Share Posted November 8, 2022 Lead me not to temptation... For I can find it for myself! Karlston, ducky88, leapinlizards and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted November 8, 2022 Share Posted November 8, 2022 Wife: Your so-called 2-in-1 universal cable doesn't work. My phone wasn't charged last night. TrojanK, vitorio, ducky88 and 2 others 1 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 Disco Bob, TrojanK, ducky88 and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 Karlston, pc71520 and ducky88 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pc71520 Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 What is Fast, Loud and Crunchy? A Rocket-Chip. ducky88 and Karlston 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 I'm not saying I hate you; what I'm saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life. ducky88 and Karlston 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 ducky88, funkyy and Karlston 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 Karlston and ducky88 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 Karlston and ducky88 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 Every sign has a story… TrojanK, aum, Disco Bob and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 funkyy, TrojanK, ducky88 and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ducky88 Posted November 10, 2022 Share Posted November 10, 2022 “Just cleared out some space in the freezer” sounds so much more productive than “I just polished off another pint of ice-cream” aum, lurch234, leapinlizards and 2 others 1 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 10, 2022 Share Posted November 10, 2022 ducky88 and Karlston 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pc71520 Posted November 10, 2022 Share Posted November 10, 2022 A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a Snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Five (5) years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same Snail. The Snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?’ Karlston, aum, funkyy and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted November 10, 2022 Share Posted November 10, 2022 My buddy is going through a divorce and just found out his wife's family is still using his Amazon Video after a year of her not signing, so he did this. aum, ducky88 and TrojanK 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disco Bob Posted November 10, 2022 Share Posted November 10, 2022 Sex before marriage is considered a sin . Sex after marriage is considered a fooking miracle !!! Karlston, ducky88, aum and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disco Bob Posted November 10, 2022 Share Posted November 10, 2022 Wife left a note on the fridge for me saying ," this isn't working, good bye ??" So I opened the fridge and it works great !!!!!!. TrojanK, ducky88, Karlston and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted November 10, 2022 Share Posted November 10, 2022 Karlston 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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