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[JOTD] Joke of the day


rudrax

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:P :lol: :P

13813664.jpg

Desi Doggy style oye! :P

Edited by slimrock
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1383210930_514f569a49859.jpg

Which category I belong to..? :think:

Of course! 2nd, :think: Nah! 1st :love: :love:

Edited by Roger D
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LADY- I want to learn tennis.!! :rolleyes:

Coach- No problem mam… Just hold this racket
as u hold ur husband pe**s. B)

Lady- Ok.. :rolleyes:

Coach- No No mam…. get the racket out of ur mouth!! :P :P :P

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LADY- I want to learn tennis.!! :rolleyes:

Coach- No problem mam… Just hold this racket

as u hold ur husband pe**s. B)

Lady- Ok.. :rolleyes:

Coach- No No mam…. get the racket out of ur mouth!! :P :P :P

:lol:

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A girl realized that she had grown hair between her legs. She got worried and asked her mom about that hair.

Her mom calmly said, “That part where the hair has grown is called Monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair.” …. the girl smiled.

At dinner, she told her sister, “My monkey has grown hair.”

Her sister smiled and said, “That’s nothing, mine is already eating bananas.”

:cheers:

One night a little girl walks in on her parents having sex. The mother is going up and down on the father and when she sees her daughter looking at them she immediately stops.

“What are you doing, Mommy?” The mother too embarassed to tell her little girl about sex so she makes up an answer.

“Well, sweetie, sometimes daddy’s tummy gets too big so I have to jump up and down on it to flatten it out.”

The little girl replies, “Well, mommy you really shouldn’t bother with that.”

The mother has a confused look on her face, “Why do you say that sweetheart?”

The little girl replies, “Because mommy, everytime you leave in the morning, the lady next door comes over and blows it back up.”

:cheers:

I had a visitor one night… he explored my body… licked, sucked, swallowed & had his fill… when satisfied he left… I was hurt… Damn mosquito!!!

:cheers:

Teacher and her 3 boy students:

Teacher: “Why did you laugh?”
Boy 1: “I saw a strap of your bra.”
Teacher: “You are punished to stay out of school for one week.”

Boy 2 laughed…
Teacher: “Why did you laugh?”
Boy 2: “I saw your bra straps.”
Teacher: “You are punished to stay out of school for one month.”

Teacher bent down to pickup a chalk.

Boy 3 started walking out of the class…
Teacher: “Why are you leaving?”
Boy 3: “I think my school days are over.”

:cheers: :lol:

Edited by STEEL
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Q: What is a man's idea of a balanced diet?

A: A Budweiser in each hand!



Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?

A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!


Q: What did the bartender say after Charles Dickens ordered a martini?

A: "Olive or twist?"


Q. Why did God invent Jameson whiskey?

A. So the Irish would never rule the world!


Q: What did the man with slab of asphalt under his arm order?

A: "A beer please, and one for the road."


Q: You know what's fun about being sober?

A: Nothing.


Q: Why did Mexicans create tequila?

A: So ugly people would have a chance at having sex! :lol:


Q: What do you get when you mix English class with alcohol?

A: Tequila Mockingbird


Q: What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?

A: Four guys drinking Bud Light and watching a football game!
:showoff:
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Q: What is a man's idea of a balanced diet?
A: A Budweiser in each hand!
Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?
A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!
Q: What did the bartender say after Charles Dickens ordered a martini?
A: "Olive or twist?"
Q. Why did God invent Jameson whiskey?
A. So the Irish would never rule the world!
Q: What did the man with slab of asphalt under his arm order?
A: "A beer please, and one for the road."
Q: You know what's fun about being sober?
A: Nothing.
Q: Why did Mexicans create tequila?
A: So ugly people would have a chance at having sex! :lol:
Q: What do you get when you mix English class with alcohol?
A: Tequila Mockingbird
Q: What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?
A: Four guys drinking Bud Light and watching a football game!
:showoff:

Already Posted :P : //www.nsaneforums.com/topic/164933-jotd-joke-of-the-day/?p=668828

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:sorry: off topic:

A group of students were asked to list what they
thought were the present "Seven Wonders of the World."
Though there were some disagreements, the following received the most votes:

1. Egypt's Great Pyramids
2. Taj Mahal
3. Grand Canyon
4. Panama Canal
5. Empire State Building
6. St. Peter's Basilica
7. China's Great Wall

While gathering the votes, the teacher noted that one student had not finished her paper yet. So she asked the girl if she was having trouble with her list.

The girl replied, "Yes, a little. I couldn't quite make up my mind because there were so many."

The teacher said, "Well, tell us what you have, and maybe we can help." The girl hesitated, then read, "I think the 'Seven Wonders of the World' are:

1. to see
2. to hear
3. to touch
4. to taste
5. to feel
6. to laugh
7. and to love."

The room was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop. The things we overlook as simple and ordinary and that we take for granted are truly wondrous!

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Two programmers in a bar:

Do you see that chick there?

Look at here “properties”! :naughty:

Yes, I've already “tested” here last night... they are read-only! :rofl:

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God called a meeting of George Bush, Tony Blair and Bill Gates. ‘I’ve given you all the tools you needed to make a better world,’ says God. ‘But you’ve failed and I’m ending the world in two weeks.’

Bush goes on TV and says, ‘I have good news and bad news. The good news is that God exists. The bad news is that the world will end in two weeks.’

Tony Blair says, ‘I have bad news and really bad news. The bad news is that God is really annoyed. The really bad news is he’s going to destroy us.

Bill Gates calls his workers together and says, ‘I have good news and great news. The good news is that God thinks I’m one of the three most powerful people in the world. The great news is that we don't have to fix the bugs in the new Windows package. :whistle:

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New Year's Resolutions for Internet Junkies...

  • I will try to figure out why I *really* need 9 e-mail addresses.
  • I will stop sending e-mail to my girlfriend.
  • I resolve to work with neglected children -- not my own.
  • I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm with which I answer my e-mail.
  • I will stop updating FB/Twitter, sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person.
  • I resolve to back up my 500GB hard drive daily...well, once a week... okay, monthly then...or maybe...
  • I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I'm not a clock watcher. When I hear "Where do you want to go today?"
  • I will not reply "nSane Tech Support."
  • When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, "LOL... LOL!"
  • I will read the nSane Community Guidelines... just as soon as I can find it.
  • I will think of a password other than "password."
  • I will stop checking nSane Forum & of course my e-mail at 3:00 in the morning... 4:30 is much more practical.
  • I resolve... I resolve to... I resolve to, uh...I resolve to, uh, get my, er..I resolve to, uh, get my, er, off-line work done, too! :unsure:
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For Indian Frnds.. :P :P

Kaminey Frnds..

13834888.jpg

Edited by Roger D
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