funkyy Posted September 2, 2022 Share Posted September 2, 2022 andy2004, I know a few people who talk through their colon. Karlston and ducky88 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted September 2, 2022 Share Posted September 2, 2022 The wedded bliss on dad’s face lurch234, TrojanK, ducky88 and 3 others 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funkyy Posted September 2, 2022 Share Posted September 2, 2022 Yep, that's a "dead man walking" expression. lurch234, ducky88 and Karlston 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ducky88 Posted September 3, 2022 Share Posted September 3, 2022 I recently bought a toilet brush. Ok, long story short I’m going back to toilet paper. Karlston, Homer Simpsom, aum and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted September 3, 2022 Share Posted September 3, 2022 A tom cat and a tabby cat were courting on a back fence at night. The tom leaned over to the tabby with pent up passion and purred, "I'll die for you" The tabby gazed at him from under lowered eye lids and asked, "How many times?". ducky88, lurch234 and Karlston 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted September 3, 2022 Share Posted September 3, 2022 Brendan had spent a week visiting his family in Kentucky. His sister-in-law and seven-year-old nephew went with him when he returned to the airport: After verifying his seat number with the counter attendant, Brendan walked back to his relatives and stated that he’d have to wait an additional three hours at the airport. “How come?” His nephew asked. My plane has been grounded,” Brendan explained. “Grounded?” The little boy said. “I didn’t know planes had parents.” lurch234, Karlston and ducky88 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disco Bob Posted September 3, 2022 Share Posted September 3, 2022 Men at 26 plays football, Men at 40 plays tennis, Men at 60 plays golf, have you noticed every year you get older your balls get smaller !! Karlston, ducky88, lurch234 and 3 others 1 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted September 3, 2022 Share Posted September 3, 2022 aum, ducky88, funkyy and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Karlston Posted September 3, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted September 3, 2022 aum, Homer Simpsom, ducky88 and 4 others 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurch234 Posted September 3, 2022 Share Posted September 3, 2022 had a vasectomy and my mom dropped off a care package! Karlston, funkyy, ducky88 and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post MagicSahar Posted September 4, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted September 4, 2022 funkyy, vitorio, Karlston and 4 others 1 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post aum Posted September 4, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted September 4, 2022 Disco Bob, funkyy, lurch234 and 4 others 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted September 4, 2022 Share Posted September 4, 2022 An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. "I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings." "That's wonderful!" the artist exclaimed. "What's the bad news?" "The guy was your doctor." TrojanK, lurch234, ducky88 and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andy2004 Posted September 4, 2022 Share Posted September 4, 2022 On 9/2/2022 at 4:18 PM, funkyy said: andy2004, I know a few people who talk through their colon. hadnt read or heard the word for a long time, so i had to google it.. and it was the first link that it came up with.. what once i would call an ASS doctor.. now the new meanings i understood. You remember.. like in the days of old when people used to say the word GAY to mean HAPPY and not BENT / QUEER or FAG. funkyy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted September 4, 2022 Share Posted September 4, 2022 For five years I diligently made sure I put my hiking socks on the correct feet. Never crossed my mind that I always picked the left one first. Today I realised I had bought large socks. aum, ducky88 and funkyy 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Karlston Posted September 4, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted September 4, 2022 Wife asked me to get her a Garden Hoe. TrojanK, funkyy, RazTK and 6 others 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted September 5, 2022 Share Posted September 5, 2022 My boss made me go into the office on Labor Day. Halfway through the day, he came in to check up on me and caught me having a beer. He said to me, "You can't drink while you're working." I said, "Oh, don't worry - I'm not working." Disco Bob, leapinlizards, funkyy and 3 others 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted September 5, 2022 Share Posted September 5, 2022 A little kid's in school, taking a true-false test and he's flipping a coin. At the end of the test he's flipping the coin again. The teacher says, "What are you doing?" He says, "Checking my answers." Karlston, funkyy and ducky88 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted September 5, 2022 Share Posted September 5, 2022 An insurance agent's wife was learning to drive when the brakes failed. "What should I do?" she cried. "Brace yourself, and try to hit something cheap." Archimede, funkyy, ducky88 and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post flash13 Posted September 5, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted September 5, 2022 funkyy, ducky88, Archimede and 4 others 2 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted September 5, 2022 Share Posted September 5, 2022 Just a rock flash13, TrojanK, ducky88 and 3 others 5 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurch234 Posted September 6, 2022 Share Posted September 6, 2022 flash13, aum, Karlston and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ducky88 Posted September 6, 2022 Share Posted September 6, 2022 Paddy & his wife were discussing their sex life. "I want to try that wheelbarrow position tonight" he said. "What the hell is that?" asked his wife. "You bend over, hands on the floor. I pick your legs up and **** you from behind" said Paddy. She says, "I'll do it on 2 conditions: 1/ If it hurts you stop straight away, and 2/ You make sure we don't go past my mums house." Archimede and aum 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted September 6, 2022 Share Posted September 6, 2022 "Kulua Airlines is pleased to announce that we have some of the best flight attendants in the industry... ... Unfortunately none of them are on this flight!" ducky88, TrojanK, Karlston and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted September 6, 2022 Share Posted September 6, 2022 A rat swallowed a diamond and the owner of the diamond contracted a man to kill the rat. When the rat hunter arrived to kill the rat there were more than a thousand rats bunched up altogether and one sitting by itself away from the pack. He spotted and killed the one sitting by itself and to the owner’s surprise, that was the exact one that had swallowed the diamond! The amazed diamond owner asked, “How did you know it was that rat?” He responded: “Very easy. When idiots get rich, they don’t mix with others!!!” TrojanK, ducky88, Karlston and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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