Jump to content

THE BEST RESIGNATION LETTER EVER


Zeus_Hunt

Recommended Posts

THE BEST RESIGNATION LETTER EVER---

(This is an actual letter of resignation from an employee at Zantex

Computers, USA, to her boss, who apparently resigned very soon

afterwards.)

Dear Mr. Baker:

As a graduate of an institution of higher education, I have a few

very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have

an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After

your consistent and annoying harassment of my coworkers and me during

the commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of

the few true genetic wastes of our time.

Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every little nuance

of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my office is

not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen. I was hired

because I know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently hired

to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly

attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" for the hundredth time.

You will never understand computers. Something as incredibly simple as

binary still gives you too many options. You will also never understand why

people hate you, but I am going to try and explain it to you, even though I

am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP is.

Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will.

You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for fault

in others. You have a sharp dressed useless look about you that may

have worked for your interview, but now that you actually have

responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover

for your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the

blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like

you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle. Since this situation is

unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I

am forced to tender my resignation, however I have a few parting thoughts.

1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you

to give me a bad recommendation. The most you can say to hurt me is "I

prefer not to comment." I will have friends randomly call you over the

next couple of years to keep you honest, because I know you would be

unable to do it on your own.

2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system, and I know

every password you have used for the last five years. If you decide to

get cute, I am going to publish your "favorites list", which I conveniently

saved when you made me "back up" your useless files. I do believe

that terms like "Lolita" are not usually viewed favorably by the administration.

3. When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of your

Mother's birthday," you neglected to mention that you were going to take

pictures of yourself in the mirror nude. Then you forgot to erase them like

the techno-moron you really are. Suffice it to say I have never seen

such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but I assure you that those have been

copied and kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of

recommendation. (Try to use a spell check please; I hate having to

correct your mistakes.)

Thank you for your time, and I expect the letter of recommendation

on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody, and all of

your little twisted, repugnant obsessions will be open to the public.

Never f*** with your systems administrator. Why? Because they know what

you do with all that free time!

Wishing you a grand and glorious day,

XXXXX

I have already made a copy of this :huh:

Link to comment
Share on other sites


  • Replies 10
  • Views 3.5k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

omg, that was great, wish i could have said something that smart when i quit :huh:

me: turn my back to em, give the finger over my shoulder, calmly yell...FUCK YOU, and slam the door on the way out :D

i still have the store manager's password for the local blockbuster system, stupid fucks had it wrote down on a sticky pad :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites


I have admin passwords for 95% of all the computers on the floor.... :huh:

Link to comment
Share on other sites


:) ...you have 95% of admin password?...r you sure about that?

Link to comment
Share on other sites


:) ...you have 95% of admin password?...r you sure about that?

Yes...

Bcoz for some stupid reason 95% of the comps on my floor have the same password for Admin.... :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites


hmmm...gotta check the other floors may be the same stupid reason apply

Link to comment
Share on other sites


The most of the training room comps had the same password as well....

Link to comment
Share on other sites


The most of the training room comps  had the same password as well....

:) ..may i know what kind of company is it?...just wondering had the same passwords.

Link to comment
Share on other sites


Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...