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This is why I fired my Secretary!


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OK! Everyone wants to know why I fired Jane. This is why:

Last week was my birthday, and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday." I thought, well, that's marriage for you. But the kids?!? They'll remember. I know they won’t forget! Soon, my kids came bounding downstairs to breakfast, but alas, not a single word.

So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent. This sucks! As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning, and by the way Happy Birthday!" I must say, I felt a little bit better that someone had remembered!

I worked until one o'clock, when Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, it is such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me?" I said, "Thanks, Jane, that is the greatest thing I have heard all day. Let's go!" We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally go, instead she chose to go to a quiet bistro with a very secluded table. We had two martinis each and I must say I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, it is such a beautiful day, we don't need to go straight back to the office, do we?" I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner."

Arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, "If you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment - I have something for you. I’ll be right back."

"Ok." I said ... feeling a little uneasy.

She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake.

Followed by....

my wife,

my kids,

dozens of my friends,

and co-workers,

all of whom were singing "Happy Birthday"!

And I just sat there....

On the couch....


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