lurch234 Posted July 15 Share Posted July 15 A husband and wife were shopping in the local Wal-Mart's and the husband picks up a case of Budweiser and put it in the shopping cart. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife. "They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans," he replies. "Put them back, we can't afford them," demands the wife. So he does and they carry on shopping. A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and put it in the shopping cart. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband. "Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful," replies the wife. Her husband retorts: "So does 24 cans of Budweiser and its half the price." Karlston, Tzcon, vitorio and 1 other 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted July 16 Share Posted July 16 ducky88 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted July 17 Share Posted July 17 ducky88 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vitorio Posted July 17 Share Posted July 17 On 7/14/2024 at 8:21 PM, lurch234 said: A husband and wife were shopping in the local Wal-Mart's and the husband picks up a case of Budweiser and put it in the shopping cart. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife. "They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans," he replies. "Put them back, we can't afford them," demands the wife. So he does and they carry on shopping. A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and put it in the shopping cart. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband. "Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful," replies the wife. Her husband retorts: "So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it’s half the price." Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! Karlston 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 ducky88 and Karlston 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 funkyy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 ducky88 and Karlston 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 funkyy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 Adenman 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 funkyy, ducky88 and Adenman 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 Adenman 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 lurch234, ducky88, funkyy and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 funkyy and ducky88 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted July 18 Share Posted July 18 ducky88 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurch234 Posted July 19 Share Posted July 19 (edited) 5 hours ago, Karlston said: Spoiler Nawww. That's a legit employee. I would've walked out with a Samsung OLED Edited July 19 by lurch234 Karlston 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 19 Share Posted July 19 (edited) Edited July 19 by aum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 19 Share Posted July 19 ducky88 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlston Posted July 19 Share Posted July 19 ducky88 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 A 50 year old lady, who suddenly started learning how to swim instead of her usual routine work of going to a Church! Everyone was curious and asked her: “why the change in your interest to swimming now a days?” The lady, with a look of helplessness replied: “Whenever my son and daughter-in-law quarrel each other She ( Daughter-in-law) always asks my son : “If your mom and I fall in water, whom will you save first?” And because I do not want to put my son in a difficult position, so I am learning how to swim!” A few days later husband and wife were quarreling again, and the daughter-in-law unreasonably asked: ” now tell me! If your mom and I fall in water, whom will you save first?” Husband replied: “I don’t have to get down in the water, my mom knows how to swim, she will save you.” Wife refused to relent: “No, you have to jump in the water, and have to save one of us”. Husband replied: “Then you will surely die because I don’t know how to swim and my mom will definitely save me first.” ducky88 and Adenman 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 A grandma was cleaning her attic with her cat by her side for company. Amongst the boxes and old papers, she found a little lamp. She picked it up and wiped it off with her apron, when “Poof” out popped Genie. “I will grant you three wishes” proclaimed Genie. The grandma thought for a moment and said, “I wish I was the most beautiful 20-year-old woman in the world, I wish I had more money than I knew what to do with, and I wish you would turn my cat into the most handsome prince around.” The Genie nodded and after a huge cloud of dust cleared, the Genie was gone and so was the lamp. The grandma looked at herself and she was certainly beautiful. She was surrounded by scads of money in large bills. She flung an armful in the air and watched it flutter down around her. She giggled with delight at the mountains of cash. Then she turned to look where her adoring cat once stood. There in the feline’s place stood a tall, dark, handsome man with chiselled features, a washboard stomach, broad shoulders, and a soccer-players-tush. She walked over to him, he put his arms around her, brushed his hand upon her cheek, looked deep into her eyes and whispered softly, “Now, aren’t you sorry that you had me n******d?” Adenman and ducky88 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 A couple invites their family over for Thanksgiving to spend the holiday together. The family gathers, but the couple’s children are late and the mother-in-law complains aloud: “Ugh, your children, always late.” Eventually, everyone comes and sits down to eat, the mother-in-law insists on sitting at the head of the table and no one has the strength to argue with her. After a few minutes, the hungry mother-in-law begins to complain: “Ugh, what’s with the food here, why is it always late?” A few minutes later, the couple brings out the meal they have prepared for their family, mostly cooked by the wife. Everyone eats and the evening continues. While they are in the middle of their main course, the mother-in-law says: “Ugh, I better start clearing the dishes so we can at least move on to the last dish on time.” A mere second after she gets up, the large wall clock hanging over the head of the table falls down, reducing her chair to pieces and almost hitting her. Everyone is in shock until the wife mumbles to herself: “Ugh, this clock… always late.” ducky88 and Adenman 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, “Now don’t get mad at me. I know we’ve been friends for a long time, but I just can’t think of your name! I’ve thought and thought, but I can’t remember it. Please tell me what your name is.” Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, “How soon do you need to know?” Adenman and ducky88 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aum Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 A police officer pulls over an elderly couple He walks up to the driver’s side window and asks the husband for his license and registration. The wife, hard of hearing, asks, “what?! What did he say to you?” The husband replies, “he wants my license!” The officer asks him if he knew how fast he was going. The wife yells “what?! What did he say to you?” The husband yells back, “he says I was speeding!” As the officer looks at the license he notices they’re from Ohio. “you know, I used to live in Ohio. Worst place ever. I was seeing this woman there, and it was just miserable. She would never shut up, couldn’t cook worth s***t, constantly belittled me. The old lady once again yells, “what?! What did he say to you?” The husband yells back, “he said you two used to date!” Adenman 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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