WIFE VS. HUSBAND

[gagquin]

A couple drove down a country road for several miles,

not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an

argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically,

"Relatives of yours?"

"Yep," the wife replied, "In-laws."

A husband read an article to his wife about how many

words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we

have to repeat everything to men...

The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you

can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.

" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made

me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;

God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

A man and his wife were having an argument about

who should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up

first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our

coffee."

The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking

around here and you should do it, because that is your

job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it

is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."

Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New

Testament and showed him at the top of several pages,

that it indeed says........ .. "HEBREWS"

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,

"Please wake me at 5:00 AM ." He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.

The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM, Wake up."