Man with WWI explosive lodged in his rectum sparks bomb scare, hospital evacuation

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The case left doctors shell-shocked.

A French hospital was partially evacuated Saturday after a senior citizen arrived with a World War I artillery shell lodged in his rectum.

The 88-year-old patient visited Hospital Sainte Musse in Toulon to have the antique explosive removed — but instead sparked a “bomb scare,” French publication Var-Matin reported.

“An emergency occurred from 9 p.m. to 11:30 p.m. on Saturday evening that required the intervention of bomb disposal personnel, the evacuation of adult and pediatric emergencies as well as the diversion of incoming emergencies,” a hospital spokesperson stated.

“We had to manage the risk in a reactive framework,” the rep added. “When in doubt, we took all the precautions.”

Oh, shell no! The WWI relic measured almost 8 inches long and more than 2 inches wide.
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Bomb disposal experts at the scene determined there was little possibility the shell would explode inside the man.

“They reassured us by telling us that it was a collector’s item from the First World War, used by the French military,” the hospital stated.

Stunned doctors subsequently began the process of trying to remove the object — which measured almost 8 inches long and more than 2 inches wide — from the man’s rectum.

It’s believed the pervy patient inserted the item up his anus for sexual pleasure.

“An apple, a mango, or even a can of shaving foam, we are used to finding unusual objects inserted where they shouldn’t be,” one doctor declared. “But a shell? Never!”

Medics were forced to take the elderly man into surgery, cutting open his abdomen in order to remove the relic.

According to the hospital, he is now in “good health” and is expected to make a full recovery from the surgery.

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