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[JOTD] Joke of the day


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Couple of decades ago, one of the husbands was working abroad and wrote a letter to his wife. He wrote: My dear love, A lot of love from me. In this month, I've sent 100 kisses instead of salary. Ple

It was a dark, stormy, night. The Marine was on his first assignment, and it was guard duty.


A General stepped out taking his dog for a walk. The nervous young Private snapped to attention, made a perfect salute, and snapped out "Sir, Good Evening, Sir!"


The General, out for some relaxation, returned the salute and said "Good evening soldier, nice night, isn't it?"


Well it wasn't a nice night, but the Private wasn't going to disagree with the General, so the he saluted again and replied "Sir, Yes Sir!".


The General continued, "You know there's something about a stormy night that I find soothing, it's really relaxing. Don't you agree?"


The Private didn't agree, but them the private was just a private, and responded "Sir, Yes Sir!"


The General, pointing at the dog, "This is a Golden Retriever, the best type of dog to train."


The Private glanced at the dog, saluted yet again and said "Sir, Yes Sir!"


The General continued "I got this dog for my wife."


The Private simply said, "Good trade Sir!"

 

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Two girls were having coffee when one noticed that the other girl seemed troubled and asked her, "Is something bugging you? You look anxious."

 

"Well, my boyfriend just lost all his money and life savings in the stock market," she explained.

 

"Oh, that's too bad," the other girl sympathized. "I'm sure you're feeling sorry for him."

 

"Yeah, I am," she said. "He'll really miss me."

 

 

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Was at the swimming pool today and needed a pee. So I went down to the deep end.

 

Unfortunately the Lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so loud that I almost fell into the water.

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A little boy told his nursery teacher he found a dead cat.


"How did you know it was dead?" his teacher asked

"Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move." the boy said.

"You did what?!" the teacher shrieked.

"You know," the boy explained, "I leaned over and went 'Psst!' in its ear and it didn't move!"

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